13 week pregnancy update

How far along? 13 weeks 3 days.. Baby is the size of a peach. 

Weight gain? Staying steady at down 12 lbs according to the doctor's office and about 15 lbs according to our home scale. 

Belly button? Still looks normal :) 

Wedding rings on or off? Still on! 

Movement? Nothing that I could say for sure is baby, but definitely feeling something. 

Maternity clothes? Yes! 

Symptoms? Feeling? Nausea and vomiting still.  Started a new medication that's helping, but I can really only take it at night because it makes me feel drunk.  

Mood? Feeling hopeful.  

Missing? Normalcy.  My friends. 

Looking forward to? Decorating the nursery. 

Sleep? Having good nights and bad.  I either sleep like a rock or I toss and turn a lot. 

Exercise? No.  Just no.  Exercise = lose my breath super easily and uncontrollable gagging.  (I have a feeling this won't change anytime soon..) I don't have the energy to do a lot. 

Any cravings? Salt.  Just salt.  I've eaten a lot of French fries lately because I want the salt.  Crunchy chicken with dipping sauce has tasted okay lately.  Orange soda makes me sick now, but orange juice has been sitting okay. 

Food aversions? Most foods still. 

I saw the doctor on Tuesday and that went okay.  She was very knowledgable about hyperemesis gravidarum and had some treatment ideas in mind before we pull out the big guns.  So this week I am on liquid promethazine and my zofran still.  The promethazine helps a lot but it makes me so so loopy and drunk feeling.   If this doesn't get my dehydration issues under control and get me drinking more, I'll have to go to the hospital twice weekly for fluids.  At that point we will discuss the possibility of steroids.  

I was also dehydrated pretty badly when they checked my urine on Tuesday.  They set up an appointment for me to go to the infusion center at the hospital for fluids and phenergan.  Unfortunately, that landed on my little boy's third birthday.  I spent most of Wednesday getting what I needed and Dawson spent most of the day with my parents.  He did play in the daycare center in the hospital for a couple of hours which must have tuckered him out because he asked them for a nap! When grandma & grandpa went to get him he was out like a light.  We celebrated with family when I got home that night and thanks to my meds I was able to eat a meal and have icecream birthday cake.  

I can hardly believe he's three already.. 

12 week pregnancy update

How far along? 12 weeks 3 days.. Baby is the size of a plum.  (Clearly it doesn't matter to my body how big or small that babe is! Ha!)

Weight gain? The scale at the doctor's office yesterday said I am down 12 lbs but if I go by ours, it still says 16 lbs. 

Belly button? Still looks normal :) 

Wedding rings on or off? Still on and still loose

Movement? Nothing yet, too early.  I wish I could feel something! 

Maternity clothes? Pants, yes.  Some shirts too! I wore the full panel jeans with Dawson but they are so uncomfortable to me this time.  I bought some side panel jeans and I'm in love.  I also got a couple of t shirts, one in the picture above.  I feel cute again instead of frumpy. 

Symptoms? Feeling? Nausea and vomiting still going on.  I ended up back in the ER Monday night because I couldn't keep anything down.  That was awful.  I could easily pass for a drug addict between my gray complexion and all the needle pokes & bruises.  It's reached a whole new level, now when I exert myself at all I throw up and get really dizzy.  Even taking a shower is tough.  I also can no longer swallow pills. 

Mood? Feeling really down.  Probably doesn't help that I haven't been able to take my antidepressant.  

Missing? Normalcy.  Ease of getting out of the house.  Socializing.  

Looking forward to? My appointment Tuesday with the high risk OB to come up with a treatment other than zofran, Reglan, and promethegan.  I'm hoping for good news and other possibilities. 

Sleep? I have been anxious this week, feeling like a burden on my family and not the best mother or wife.  Sleep has been tough sometimes as a result.  

Exercise? No.  Just no.  Exercise = lose my breath super easily and uncontrollable gagging.  (I have a feeling this won't change anytime soon..) I did take a walk in the mall with mom and Dawson. 

Any cravings? No cravings.  I've eaten chicken sandwiches from Burger King recently.. Crunchy and salty.  Last night I was able to hold down Greek yogurt with almonds and high protein granola.  I can barely choke down decaf iced tea anymore so I have moved on to orange soda.  

Food aversions? Everything.  No joke.  Even the things I can choke down sound awful 24/7.  (I'm super hopeful this answer will change soon!!) 

It's been a rough week.. My pharmacy is not helping.  They don't seem to carry my zofran regularly and so 9 times out of 10 I go to get it filled and it takes them DAYS.. Which, when I'm only getting 10 at a time, is just not doable.  Every time I lapse on the zofran I end up in big big trouble.  My mom is actually out right now switching my prescription to another pharmacy because I have had so much trouble.  Hopefully Tuesday I will have either a new prescription for more than 10 or a prescription for something else entirely. 

My husband and my mom have been.. I just can't even say how wonderful.  Joe has taken over taking care of Dawson and he runs to get me whatever I need whenever I need it, with ZERO complaints.  He's amazing.  My mom packs her bag at the drop of a hat to come to me to help.  I can't say how thankful I am for my family right now.  This is all very hard but without them I'm not sure I could do it at all.  I love you guys! 

11 week pregnancy update

How far along? 11 weeks 3 days.. Baby is the size of a lime. 

Weight gain? The scale says I'm down another few lbs.. For a total of 16 lbs lost since week 6. 

Belly button? Still looks normal :) 

Wedding rings on or off? Still on.. Actually getting a bit loose. 

Movement? Nothing yet, too early.  

Maternity clothes? Pants, yes.  Some shirts too!

Symptoms? Feeling? Nausea and vomiting still going on.  I was actually feeling a little better last week than this week.  Lots more vomiting and I haven't been able to convince myself to eat dinner most nights.

Mood? Feeling real discouraged lately.  I keep hoping for a miracle, that I'll wake up feeling awesome one day but that hasn't happened. 

Missing? Food actually sounding good.  I also miss not worrying so much about how many fluids I'm getting down. 

Looking forward to? Feeling movement.  I can't wait for that.  

Sleep? I have been sleeping like a rock this week, just not long enough.  I'm trying to read before bed, it helps me fall asleep easier.  

Exercise? No.  Just no.  Exercise = lose my breath super easily and uncontrollable gagging. 

Any cravings? No cravings.  Still eating mostly turkey sandwiches from burgerville, Arby's, or panera.  I have also eaten top ramen a couple of times this week and fresh blueberries.  Still drinking decaf iced tea but getting really sick of it. 

Food aversions? Everything.  No joke.  Even the things I can choke down sound awful 24/7.  I can't go to the grocery store or make easy mac for Dawson because even seeing food makes me gag.  Awesome.

10 week pregnancy update

It's been hard to write lately as Dawson has decided he no longer needs a nap!  Anyway I thought I would start some updates weekly.

I had my first appointment with my new midwife last week and I really love her.  She was unlike any doctor I have had before.  She completely let me take the lead and actually talked to me, not just sat and filled me with medical information.  It put my anxiety at ease pretty much immediately.  She asked a lot of questions about my pregnancy with Dawson and my delivery and it brought back memories I feel I have tucked away because I really didn't enjoy it all at the moment.  

I started thinking a lot about bringing another baby home and I won't lie, I have had some serious moments of panic when I think "what the heck are we doing?!" As Joe told me during transition with Dawson.. Too late now :) 

I had an ultrasound at 10 weeks on the dot and was measuring right on schedule.. And most importantly, there's only one kickin' around in there! I've also consistently been able to find the baby's heartbeat with the home doppler.  

How far along? 10 weeks 3 days.  Baby is the size of a prune! 

Weight gain? According to the scale this morning I have actually lost about 12 pounds since my hospital visit for fluids.  

Belly button? Still looks normal :) 

Wedding rings on or off? Still on.. I think I was somewhere near the end of my 2nd trimester with Dawson when I finally put them on a chain around my neck. 

Movement? Nothing yet, too early.  We did see him or her wiggling away during the ultrasound though! 

Maternity clothes? Pants, yes.  Still wearing a lot of my regular shirts but not all.  

Symptoms? Feeling? Nausea and vomiting still going on.  I'm on zofran 3 times a day and Reglan and promethegan as needed.  Most days I need a combination.  I'm still feeling really awful.  Tired, lots of nausea, still fighting a cough and the pregnancy rhinitis has kicked up this week full force.  My energy level is pretty low.  

Mood? Depends on when you ask me!  The nausea, vomiting, and loss of cooking has me pretty down.  I'm at home a lot and quite frankly I'm tired of it.  I miss my social life. 

Missing? Real food, cooking dinner, baking.  It also just dawned on me that I will not be enjoying any ice cold beer this summer either. 

Looking forward to? Getting the heck out of the first trimester.  Also, starting group prenatal visits next month. 

Sleep? Between Dawson and my cold, it's not going well.  I'm also finding it hard to breathe when I lay on my back now which didn't hit until 3rd trimester with Dawson. 

Exercise? Very little of that going on.  I try to take a walk with Dawson outside when it's not raining.  I miss running but it's kicking my asthma up and I just do not have the energy for it.  

Any cravings? No cravings really.  My go-to foods are turkey sandwiches (has to be from someplace out), stroganoff, plain croissants, and iced tea (decaf).  Otherwise I haven't been eating much else.  Salty and crunchy things seem to go down the easiest. 

Food aversions? Everything? Grilled chicken, same as last pregnancy.  Anything savory or sweet.  Anyone who knows me knows I am a sucker for sweets.. Baked goods, icecream,  chocolate.. But I can hardly look at it right now.  

Otherwise we are just chugging along.   I'll try to write more often! 

Boy or girl? Why does it matter?

This pregnancy has come with some questions that I don't remember getting with Dawson, although I am sure I got them.

The biggest question Joe and I have gotten during this pregnancy thus far is whether or not we want a boy or a girl this time.  Most people assume we would like a girl because we already have a boy.  Joe and I have pretty much maintained that we want a healthy happy baby, whether it be a boy or a girl.  We would be over the moon for another boy, but equally excited if the baby is a girl.

I will admit that when I was pregnant with Dawson I wanted a boy.  Somehow in my deluded little head I decided a boy would be easier because they aren't so dramatic.  Obviously I was wrong.  Dawson has enough drama for 8 kids and then some.  He has not been an easy child in general.  I love him to pieces but he has been a challenge.  I guess that's what parenthood is all about though! 

 I feel like almost on a daily basis I watch someone (whether it be in person or through Facebook or blogs) struggle.  Sometimes their struggle involves just having a baby, sometimes it's that their babies have minor or even severe health problems.  If our baby was not healthy, I wouldn't love him or her any less by any means, but I know it would come with challenges that make Dawson seem like a walk in the park.   

Right now I am doing my best to just focus on taking care of myself.  I am still struggling with fluids, and I have had some touch and go moments where the possibility I would end up in the hospital again is high.  I've lost about 10-12 pounds over the last couple of weeks.  Keeping my eye on the prize... A healthy baby.  

Pregnancy sucks.

And it's awesome all at the same time.  This week though, it sucks.  There, I said it.

Thursday morning sickness hit me like a truck.  I managed to eat throughout the day and drink some Gatorade.   Zofran (anti nausea medication) is a complete joke this time around.  

Friday morning I took a tumble down our stairs.  I'm okay, but pregnancy sure did throw a wrench in the healing process.  I called my midwife's office and they told me to go to urgent care or my primary care provider.  I was a little panicked so I called Dawson's doctor's office (he goes to a family practice) and asked if they could see me on short notice.  They did, but they weren't so helpful.  They told me to take Tylenol, ice it, and stretch.  

I managed through the weekend with Joe's help.  Did I mention this is all at the tail end of Joe having the flu for 4 days? Yeah.  Poor guy goes from that to his wife throwing up, not cooking, and falling down the stairs and calling him all emergency style at his work.  

Monday I was still not doing well.  I was in a lot of pain (understatement of the century) so I called my midwife's office again and this time they sent me to the ER because the nurse was fairly certain with all the throwing up and struggling to drink, I probably would need fluids as well as something for the pain. Awesome! Monday night was spent in the ER.  Many of you who know me know that I HATE having an IV with a passion.  A couple of years ago my anxiety would have kept me at home denying the fact that I needed anything.  I did it though.  I felt like this was a pretty big accomplishment for me, as silly as that sounds.  

Tomorrow is my intake appointment (a class on dos and don'ts) and blood work at my midwife's office.. Even though I was just there yesterday.   Joe is going with me.  Then my next appointment will be on the 23rd, when we get to see baby for the first time.. I also have anxiety about that, but that's another post.  I'm not going to lie, I am not looking forward to tomorrow.   I don't like having blood taken, although I do survive each time.  I am one of those people that struggles to not pass out afterwards and during. The first blood draw for pregnancy just flat sucks.  They take quite a bit of blood.  I'm trying not to psych myself out about it.  Joe will be there to hold my hand and it will be over semi quickly.  

I'm still pretty sore almost a week after my fall, but I am learning to work around things.  I just can't do everything right now.   I feel like this is early training for what it will be like when I'm much larger and having to take care of Dawson.  I'm learning to get creative :) help from Grandma K sure does help too! 

There's the update :)